Athlete tries cutting her legs to tour Rio for Paralympics

Yatra's yatra dream:

As Paralympics is all set to begin next month at Rio, an Indian athlete by name 'Yatra', tried to cut her legs with a sharp axe before getting saved by her fellow athletes after an as usual disappointing performance at Rio. It is to be said that Ms.Yatra has even claimed that the travel booking portal 'www.yatra.com' was named after her after getting inspired by her urge to travel to new destinations even without obtaining her permission.

Picture: Swimmer in Paralympics who inspired Yatra to do this dreadful act

When asked for the reason for her act, Yatra weeped from her heart stating that, her Rio Olympic (travel) journey was cut short as she was eliminated in the Qualifiers of the Swimming event of the games itself. Yatra said, "I yatra, have previously decided to undergo yatra around entire Rio... no no even around entire brazil, but the bloody Olympic games organisers have destroyed by dream by sending me packing even before the start of the competitive rounds of the swimming event itself. So on behalf of all my country people, I urge Olympic association to conduct qualifiers at the end of the games during closing ceremony so that candidates like me could atleast complete our travel mission if not our Olympic mission!

'Eureka' moment for Yatra:

Yatra further added, "Unable to complete my yatra, I felt utterly disgusted, frustrated and was under severe depression for the next few days. At that time, one of a stupid sports enthusiast who knew nothing about the games (just like many of us watching the Rio games in television in the absence of cricket match) came to me and said, "Don't worry dear, Better luck next time. The gates of Rio are always open for you in Paralympics. You can come back and bag gold in the same city next month". This ignited a spark in Yatra's mind and she took his words seriously and started exploring all possibilities of participating in Paralympics, not to win a medal for our country but to visit the left out sight seeing places at Rio-de-Janeiro!

Just like Archimedes, on one fine day while she was bathing in her bath tub when this terrible idea hit her mind and out came Yatra shouting Eureka...Eureka... (but with clothes... you corrupted minded fellows!!!)  as she understood that she can only participate if she is physically challenged. As she cannot cut her hands as she need them to take selfie shots at sight seeing places, she decided to cut one of her foot. She did not hesitate to do so as she was confident enough of not qualifying for next Summer Olympics qualifiers itself given her poor timing clocked at Rio. At last she came to a conclusion that her legs are not worth more than a travel ticket to Rio, and so she mentally prepared herself and bought a new axe and tried cutting her legs out of sheer stupidness...

Picture: List of all places yet to be visited in Yatra's shortened Rio travel itinerary

Alternate ways to tour Rio:

Meanwhile, several sports enthusiasts have advised Yatra, not to take such stupid decisions as there are many other ways to accomplish her dream mission. An anonymous sports columnist has even come forward and said, "May be Yatra can take up a coaching job for Paralympic athletes inorder to visit Rio for Paralympics", as the number of officials accompanying the athletes seemed to have increased multiple times more than the athletes itself at the recently concluded Rio Olympics. Another leading political activist and a strict Andi-Modiist commented, "Or probably she could stand in PM elections to get exclusive rights to visit Rio anytime in her own time even after Paralympics like our PM Namo!".